Impact opens with highlights from Final Resolution, which includes the debut of Suicide, the winners of the Feast or Fired match and the battle between the Main Event Mafia and the Frontline.
The Impact intro hits and we are welcomed the this weeks show that will feature a Beer Bottle on a Pole match between Abyss and James Storm and the final three cases for Feast or Fired will be revealed.
The music for the Main Event Mafia hits as they all make their way down to the ring. Angle gets on the microphone and tells Mick Foley that he beat him at his own game and will now face Jeff Jarrett at Genesis. Angle begins talking about coming over to TNA and Jarrett becoming jealous although he was making money for him.
AJ Styles comes out onto the entrance ramp and calls Angle a douche bag and says Jarrett will make an example out of him at Genesis. Styles says that he isn’t here to talk about that, though, and wants to address Sting. Styles questions Sting and his principles about how his team won the match at Final Resolution. Angle cuts him off and calls Styles a punk and asks him to confront Sting man-to-man.
The MEM clear the ring so Styles can meet him face to face. Styles begins jawing with Sting before it comes to blows. The Mafia quickly get back into the ring to help out their partners until the Frontline storms the ring and chases them away. Angle then warns them that one member of the Frontline will be eliminated tonight.
Jeremy Borash is in Jarrett’s office with him and Mick Foley. Borash asks how Jarrett plans on being both the head of TNA while having to face Kurt Angle at Genesis. Jarrett says from this point forward he will become Jeff Jarrett the wrestler and gives Foley all of the stroke in TNA.
Mike Tenay and Don West recap the results of the Feast or Fired match and say that two of the winners will get title matches and one will be fired. Tenay also says that Alex Shelley is still upset about losing one of the cases to Jay Lethal, which held a shot at the tag team belts. As for the controversial finish of the X Division Title match, a tournament will start tonight to crown a new champion. The first two quarterfinal matches will take place tonight.
Lauren is standing by with the Motorcity Machine Guns who talks about having targets on their backs lately. Shelley says that they are going to make the best of the situation and makes it his quest to win the X Division Title.
Match 1: Sheik Abdul Bashir vs. Eric Young (X Division Tournament Quarterfinals)
Bashir wears the turban that is stained with Shane Sewell’s blood. The bell rings and EY goes on the quick attack and tries to put the match away with a few quick pin attempts. Bashir is able to turn the match into his favor and begins to wear Young down with a headlock. Bashir then tries for a high risk move but catches EY’s boot. Young then connects with a Death Valley Driver but misses with a top rope elbow drop. Bashir then gets in a shoving match with Earl Hebner and EY puts the match away with a bridging suplex.
We head into the locker room of the Frontline where Brother Ray is giving them a pep talk and talks about how great it was to fight side by side with them at Final Resolution. Ray also says that they are not going to wait around for the MEM to talk one of them out and are going to take the fight to them. Brother Ray says he is going to go out a make Angle an offer he can’t refuse.
Jeremy Borash shills the TNA mobile service and Mick Foley is seen walking out of the Main Event Mafia’s dressing room. Foley has a huge smile on his face and says that he has forgotten how much fun it is to be around those guys. The members walk out of the room one by one and tell Foley how good it is that he has come around. Foley says that they are misunderstood and walks away.
Lauren is with the Beautiful People and “Gov. Sarah Palin” who say that they are going to be named as part of her cabinet. Palin says that they can’t go to the White House dressed the way they are and will let them wear suits from her own personal collection.
A vignette is aired for Brutus Magnus that says he is a modern day gladiator and bred to win. He will be making his debut soon.
Match 2: Alex Shelley vs. Jay Lethal (X Division Tournament Quarterfinals)
Shelley goes on the attack before Lethal is even able to take his ring jacket off. Lethal begins to fight back, however, and picks up a two count. With Lethal heading to the top rope, Sabin causes a distraction, which allows Shelley to regain control and takes him down with an over the shoulder piledriver to pick up the win. Shelley will now face Eric Young in the semi-finals.
Chris Sabin gets on the microphone and gives Mick Foley props from screwing them over at Final Resolution. Sabin wants what they won and they want Foley to fix the situation right now. The lights go down and Suicide repels down to the ring and takes it to the Guns and hits Sabin with the DOA before doing the trademark Jeff Hardy finger salute.
Lauren is backstage with Abyss and Matt Morgan and Morgan wants to know how many times he is going to fall into their trap. Abyss says they promised to introduce them to Peter and Quagmire last week. Morgan tells Abyss they are cartoon characters and tells him to stop being so gullible. Morgan says he wants to see him take James Storm out.
A TNA Rough Cut segment is aired and this week it is focusing on James Storm, who talks about growing up on a farm. He said growing up in the south he grew up watching wrestling and got into wrestling in school where he won a state championship. Storm talks about seeing an ad about training to be a pro wrestler and started training shortly after.
Match 3: James Storm vs. Abyss (Beer Bottle on a Pole Match)
A bucket full of ice and a beer is hanging from a pole in one of the corners. The bell rings and Storm goes right for the bottle but Abyss pulls him down and slams him down hard on the mat. Abyss then tosses Storm out to the floor and they begin fighting in the crowd. Storm grabs a steel chair but Abyss punches it into his face before rolling him back into the ring.
Abyss begins climbing up to get the bottle but Storm kicks him down. Storm levels Abyss again with another superkick and grabs the beer bottle. Storm takes a few drinks out of the bottle but Abyss takes him down with a Black Hole Slam. Abyss picks up the bottle but Jacqueline comes in and steals it away from him. Matt Morgan then stops her but Robert Roode comes down and nails him with a low blow. Roode then hits Abyss with a steel chair and Storm covers to pick up the win.
Beer Money continues to attack Abyss until Morgan comes in and saves his partner. Morgan begins to set up for the Hellevator on Roode but Storm smashes the beer bottle on the back of his head. Abyss then comes in with a chair and chases them out of the ring as his partner is laid out in the ring.
Jeremy Borash is with the MEM and Nash says they did what they did on Sunday because the World Championship was on the line. Team 3D’s music then hits as Angle wants them all to pay attention to what Brother Ray has to say on the monitor.
Brother Ray is in the ring and wants to talk to Angle face to face in the ring. Angle comes out by himself and Ray tells him that there is a potential for a lot of blood to be spilled, bones to be broken and careers ended. Ray tells Angle that the Frontline will not sleep until they rid TNA of the Main Event Mafia, however, if they are out to destroy each other, they will in essence destroy TNA. Ray proposes that the two settle it in the ring by themselves with both of their groups leave the building. The two then shake on it and the match is set for later on tonight.
After a commercial break, Brother Ray tells them that they have to leave. The Machine Guns are the first to take him up on the offer and Ray tells them that if he wins the Mafia will break up, but if they win the Frontline will break up. Styles doesn’t like the idea but he leads the group out. Brother Devon doesn’t move, though, and says that he isn’t going anywhere. Ray asks him to leave and Devon finally heads out.
Jeremy Borash is with the Mafia and Angle is asking them to leave the building. Booker warns Angle that Brother Ray will go toe-to-toe with him and tells Angle to take care of business as they begin leaving the dressing room.
Lauren is with the Beautiful People who are now in her suits. Love and Sky aren’t too keen with how they look but Palin says they look like Beyonce. Cute Kip begins telling them that it isn’t their type of look but Palin takes them away to give them a few final touches.
A Feast or Fired video package is aired and we head to the ring where Jeremy Borash is standing by with the three remaining winners. The cases are sitting on top of some podiums in the ring and the first one to be opened is the one grabbed by Hernandez, which contains a shot at the World Championship. Hernandez celebrates with the case in the ring as Homicide congratulates his partner.
Curry Man is the next one to be opened next and he is fired, which means Homicide will be getting a shot at the X Division Title. Borash tells him that he is at the end of his road and security will escort him from the building. Curry Man is having a hard time understanding what is going on and thinks he is going to sign a contract for a title shot.
Match 4: Sojournor Bolt vs. Christy Hemme
Hemme comes out with some new music and it looks she has finally rid herself of the Rock n’ Rave Infection. The match starts Christy is able to lock Bolt in a leg scissors and a hammerlock but Bolt comes back with a snapmare and a dropkick. Christy is able to bend her way out of an attempt at a clothesline as the action slowly goes back and forth between the two until Christy is able to counter an attempt at a powerbomb into a roll up for the pin fall. After the match, Hemme shakes Bolt’s hand after the match and Bolt slaps her across the face. The two begin to go at it again as more referees are called into the ring to pull them apart.
Lauren is backstage where Curry Man still doesn’t know what is going on. Lauren tells him that he is fired and wants a shot at the Fired Champion. Security carry him out as we a treated to a Curry Man montage of his short career in TNA. It ends by saying “Curry Man 2008-2008, we barely knew thee.”
Match 5: Brother Ray vs. Kurt Angle
Angle doesn’t come out during his ring entrance and attacks Brother Ray from behind to start this match out. Angle is relentless in his attack as the fans try to rally behind Ray, who finally gains some offense with a couple of hard clotheslines. Ray gives Angle a release German suplex before sending him out to the floor. Ray follows him out to the floor and sends Angle into the guard railing and the announce table. Ray sets him up next to the entrance ramp and charges at him, but Angle is able to sidestep and Ray crashes through the wall as we head into a commercial break.
We return from break to see that Brother Ray is a bloody mess but is still beating the hell out of Angle as they are still fighting around the backstage area. Referee Slick Johnson calls for the match and throws this match out as they fight their way into the parking lot. Ray sends Angle into the side of one of the production trucks before sending him crashing into the catering tables.
Security tries to come in but Ray knocks them down and tells Angle that if he didn’t have a wife and kids, he’d end his career right now. Angle begs for Ray to stop and tells him that he is no longer with the MEM as Ray is then blindsided by the rest of the members of the Mafia, who are armed with boards, pipes and chairs. The Mafia begins beating down Ray as Sting looks on before he turns around and walks away. They then toss Ray into a dumpster and Angle says that no one messes with the Main Event Mafia as Impact comes to a close.
Quick Results
- Eric Young defeated Sheik Abdul Bashir by pin fall in the X Division Quarterfinal Tournament.
- Alex Shelley defeated Jay Lethal by pin fall in the X Division Quarterfinal Tournament.
- James Storm defeated Abyss by pin fall in a Beer Bottle on a Pole match.
- Christy Hemme defeated Sojournor Bolt by pin fall.
- Brother Ray and Kurt Angle fought to a no contest.
Starman’s Thoughts
Tonight’s show was a bit of a mixed bag in my mind. Parts of it were great while others stunk it up big time.
I am really digging the X Division Tournament. For the longest time the X Division has been a mere shell of its former self and I am optimistic that this will help put it on the right path. The first two quarterfinal matches were lacking and had some sort of shady finish, but it was nice to see the division given some attention and focus for once.
Although, I’d much rather see the Feast or Fired briefcases opened at Final Resolution, I am glad that they at least opened the cases tonight and not have it drag out like they did last year. After seeing that Jay Lethal won the shot at the tag team titles, it was fairly predictable on how the rest of it would shape out.
Curry Man being the one fired shouldn’t have been that big of a shock to anyone and although I enjoyed his act, it was time for him to move on. Hopefully this means that Christopher Daniels will return as his former self after being the unlucky one who was fired at last years Feast or Fired unveiling.
For those who like to keep score at home, that would make Daniels 2 for 2 when it comes to being the one with the briefcase that has the pink slip.
Finally, for the good things with tonight’s show, I found it interesting to see Mick Foley coming out of the Main Event Mafia’s dressing room with a huge smile on his face and being all buddy-buddy with them. It doesn’t seem to make a lot of sense in the sense of the current storyline, but it did gain my interest to see where they are going with all of this. Although, I really hope they don’t go the route of having a good owner (Jarrett) bad owner (Foley) route with all of this.
As I said before, it was a mixed bag tonight and for every good segment that took place, there was an equally bad one to follow it up.
With a few exceptions, Impact is primarily a taped show. I know their taping schedule, though, although I am wondering if the creative staff knows that Barack Obama won the election. Had John McCain successfully ran for office, the Sarah Palin skits probably wouldn’t be all that bad. Wait, I take that back, yes, they still would be that bad. Enough is enough already.
Then there was the horrendous match between Christy Hemme and Sojournor Bolt. I will say that Christy really is trying and will leave it at that as the match spoke volumes on its own.
If that wasn’t bad enough, the Beer Bottle on a Pole match made up for it, especially considering that Abyss and James Storm were fighting to reach a beer bottle that wasn’t even used in the outcome of the match. So, what exactly was the point of the match exactly?
It shouldn’t surprise me, however, as the creative team seems to have some unnatural obsession with pole matches. I have been coving and reporting on Impact now for 2 ½ years and I have every report I have written backed up on my computer. If I have some free time over the weekend, I may go through them and start a list of every pole match that TNA has used.
Maybe TNA will make it easy for me a release a Best of the Pole Matches DVD for their fans. That sure would be the ultimate Christmas gift.
