The Egotistical Eight (5/1 Impact Recap)

A video package highlighting last week’s events opens the show and we are reminded that a new match concept for Sacrifice will be revealed. The Impact intro hits and we are welcomed to tonight’s show that will feature a tag team match between Kurt Angle & Samoa Joe taking on Scott Steiner & Petey Williams. On top of that, there will be two more qualifying matches for the Deuces Wild tournament.

Match 1: Curry Man & Shark Boy vs. the Motorcity Machine Guns
Prior to the match, Mike Tenay announces that the World X Cup will be returning later this summer. The match begins and the Machine Guns take turns on Curry Man and have the crowd strongly behind them. Shark Boy turns the tide into his favor by landing a Lou Thesz press on Chris Sabin and Curry Man takes over from there until he is dumped off of the top rope by Alex Shelley. Sabin then tags in his partner, who sends both of his opponents to the floor and the Machine Guns follow with double suicide dive through the ropes. Scott Steiner’s siren hits and Petey Williams runs to the ring with his hair died blond and sporting a goatee like Steiner. The Machine Guns make quick work out of him, but Steiner sends them down with a double clothesline and Earl Hebner tosses this match out.

Scott Steiner gets on the microphone and says he caused Kurt Angle his match last week and he is glad to have him in a three way match at Sacrifice so he can steal his gold medal and make him his bitch. Kurt Angle comes out and sends Williams out of the ring before getting Steiner into an ankle lock. Williams comes back in and nails Angle with a lead pipe before Steiner locks in the Steiner Recliner. Samoa Joe comes out and takes Steiner and Williams down with a couple of clotheslines and they bail out of the ring.

Jeremy Borash is with AJ Styles outside of Jim Cornette’s office. Styles says he doesn’t have a partner for the tournament tonight as Tomko was injured during a MMA fight in Japan. Styles then questions Borash on how Angle found out about Karen Angle being in the Impact Zone last week but the two are interrupted by Jim Cornette, who says that he will announce the eight single participants for the Deuces Wild tournament tonight. Cornette then tells Styles to find a partner or he will forfeit his match against the Rock n’ Rave Infection.

Mike Tenay is standing in the ring and invites Angelina Love and Velvet Sky to come down. Tenay talks about the Knockout Makeover Battle Royal and asks if they are ready to make the ultimate sacrifice. They say they are not scared and want to make sure the makeover goes to someone who needs it as photo mock ups of a bald Gail Kim and ODB are shown on the big screen. Kim and ODB come to the ring and push them down and a brawl ensues. Love & Sky leave the ring, which appears to have caused a wardrobe malfunction for Love, and ODB challenges the two to a match later on tonight.

Jeremy Borash is still with Styles who is lookeing for a tag team partner. He heads towards Booker T’s dressing room and runs into Angle, who asks Styles if he has seen Karen lately. Styles says he hasn’t and Angle replies by saying he better keep it that way. Styles enters Booker’s dressing room and Booker acts like he doesn’t know who he is and tells him to leave his dressing room.

Lauren is backstage with Samoa Joe and Kevin Nash, who is holding Joe’s World Title over his shoulder. Joe says that he welcomes competition and is looking forward to the three way match at Sacrifice. Joe says he also loves being the champ, to which Nash chimes in and tells him to also love the money as well.

Match 2: Kaz & Eric Young vs. the LAX (Deuces Wild Qualifier)
The match goes back and forth with Kaz scoring a two count on Homicide after landing a high springboard leg drop and Hernandez picking up a near fall of his own on Kaz with a sit-out powerbomb. LAX takes over from there until they make one wrong double team move, which allows Kaz to make the tag to his partner. Eric Young comes in and blocks an attempt at the gringo killer, however, Homicide rolls up Young and scores the pin fall for the win.

After the match, Young & Kaz congratulate Homicide & Hernandez on their win. Homicide then gets on the microphone and calls out Hector Guerrero to the ring. Homicide tells him that they have studied a lot of tapes, especially those of the Guerrero family. He then tells Hector that he wants him in their corner at Sacrifice and to hrlp guide them to the tag team titles. Guerrero agrees and they all celebrate in the ring together.

Matt Morgan joins Jim Cornette in his office and wants to be one of the eight men in the Deuces Wild tournament. Cornette says he has to wait to find out like everyone else. Kip James then attacks Morgan from behind until security comes in and breaks it up.

Styles is still looking for a partner and decides to hit up Kevin Nash. Styles tells Nash that there is big money in the tag team division but Nash says the real money is with the World title. Styles reminds him that Joe is the champion and Nash tells him that he knows he is and walks off.

Match 3: Angelina Love & Velvet Sky vs. Gail Kim & ODB
After going back and forth in the opening minutes of the match, the Beautiful People gain the advantage and take turns working on Gail Kim. Love picks up a near fall after landing a big boot but both her and Kim go down after they follow with a double clothesline on each other. They both make it to their corners and make tags and ODB comes in and takes out both of her opponents. ODB then delivers a running power slam to Sky and picks up the win.

Love breaks up their post-match celebration but is tossed out of the ring shortly after. Roxxi Laveaux makes her way out to the ring and picks up the pieces and delivers the Voodoo Drop to Love. ODB shares her flask with Roxxi and Kim as they finish celebrating.

Borash is with Robert Roode and James Storm in the locker room. Styles comes in and says that he still needs a partner and tries to get Storm as his partner by bringing him some liquor, but its not his kind. Roode tells him that they are both in the “Egotistical Eight” and refuse to be his partner and leave the room. A shadow then appears and Styles smiles as he asks the unknown person to be his partner.

Match 4: The Rock n’ Rave Infection vs. AJ Styles & Super Eric (Deuces Wild Qualifier)
Super Eric is announced as Styles’ partner and the announce team talks about how this has come full circle as the two had huge parts into the Deuces Wild tournament coming about. The two work well together against the RnR Infection as they get in most of the offense in the early part of the match. Christy Hemme trips up Styles, which gives her team the advantage for the first time. It doesn’t last long, though, as Styles nails Rave with the Pele before he tags in Super Eric, who puts Rave away with the Death Valley Driver.

Jeremy Borash with Sting who says TNA is a looney bin and says he doesn’t know who he can and cannot trust. He then says it is time for the egotistical eight and wants to know what Jim Cornette has up his sleeve.

At the announce table, Mike Tenay and Don West talk about what makes TNA different from the competition, such as the six sided ring, Lethal Lockdown, Ultimate X and Elevation X. With that said, it is time to see the newest innovation: the TerrorDome, which is a match that consists of a fully enclosed cage with a small hole at the top that a participant must crawl through in order to win the match.

Match 5: Daisy Haze vs. Cheerleader Melissa
A pair of Knockout debuts tonight between these two participants… or is it. Cheerleader Melissa looks like she has the same eyes as Raisha Saeed. Melissa tosses Daisy Haze around the ring, literally, for a bit before sending her crashing down to the mat with a vertebreaker for the win.

Lauren is with Scott Steiner, Petey Williams and Rhaka Khan. Steiner says at Sacrifice he has a 66 2/3% chance of winning since Kurt Angle knows he can’t beat him and won’t even try. Steiner then starts doing the math for the rest of his odds and comes up with him having a 140 2/3% chance of winning the title.

Match 6: Scott Steiner & Petey Williams vs. Kurt Angle & Samoa Joe
These two teams go back and forth in the ring as the match starts. Williams & Steiner begin working on Samoa Joe and pick up a few near falls on the champ. Joe, however, is finally able to put up a boot in Williams face and goes over to tag Angle into the match, but gives Angle the finger instead. Joe begins working over both of his opponents as Angle comes in a knocks Steiner out to the floor. Joe locks in the rear naked choke on Williams and Angle nails Joe from behind. Angle tries for the Olympic slam but Joe gets out of it and nails him with a boot to the face. Joe then delivers the muscle buster to Williams to pick up the win.

After the match, Angle hits a German suplex on Joe and applies the ankle lock until Steiner comes in and chases him away with a lead pipe. Angle leaves the ring and Steiner clocks Joe in the head with it and then celebrates with the World title.

Jim Cornette is in the ring with the tag team titles sitting on a table. Cornette says that four teams have already qualified for the tournament and a random pairing of another four teams will be made from these eight wrestlers: Matt Morgan, Kip James, BG James, James Storm, Booker T, Robert Roode, Sting and a surprise entrant of the TNA Knockout Champion, Awesome Kong.

Quick Results
- Curry Man & Shark Boy vs. the Motorcity Machine Guns was declared a no contest.
- The LAX defeated Kaz & Eric Young by pin fall to qualify for the Deuces Wild tournament.
- Gail Kim & ODB defeated Angelina Love & Velvet Sky by pin fall.
- AJ Styles & Super Eric defeated the Rock n’ Rave Infection to qualify for the Deuces Wild tournament.
- Cheerleader Melissa defeated Daisy Haze by pin fall.
- Samoa Joe & Kurt Angle defeated Scott Steiner & Petey Williams by pin fall.

Starman’s Thoughts
With tonight’s show, TNA seemed to take everything that worked right last week and tossed it in the garbage. Instead of having just four good matches we got the mostly forgettable standard six matches that is the norm for Impact. I’m not saying that tonight’s show was terrible, but it was a big step down from last week.

The Deuces Wild tournament is shaping up and we already know that Team 3D, Christian Cage & Rhino, the LAX, and AJ Styles & Super Eric will be in the tournament along with the “egotistical eight” that were announced at the end of the show. For the most part, everyone who was announced as a participant was predictable, save for Awesome Kong.

Kong truly is the “wild” card in this tournament and I am interested in seeing where they take this. She has decimated her division since her arrival in TNA and her size and strength is pretty much on par with the other 15 people in the tournament. I wouldn’t enjoy seeing her holding the titles at all, but it will be fun to see how she stacks up against the men nonetheless.

Petey Williams debuted a new look tonight and, much like several others on the roster, is a rehash of a another wrestler… one who happens to be his partner. Yes, it was decided to take “Little Petey Pump” to the next level with Williams sporting a Steiner-like goatee and blond hair. Along with the chain mail and the sunglasses, the two did look eerily similar to the point that it was almost borderline creepy. Here’s to TNA’s creativity.

At least they did get some things right, like having the LAX advance in the Deuces Wild tag team tournament.